Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Summer is here!!!!

Yes, it's not officially Summer yet, but we know it has arrived. Children are getting off school soon, friends that are teachers have begun counting days on their Facebook pages and everyone is talking about vacations. I remember those days in Curaçao! Children couldn't wait, expat friends started getting tickets for their trips home, the ones that were not traveling were planning vacation activities for the children....memories, but do not get me wrong. I have no desire to have school age children. Do not have the energy. Besides, I don't have the savvy either...children these days know too much and are allowed too much saying in plans and things.....NEEEE!

I do, though, miss the planning of vacations, the looking forward to being away from home for a while and visiting other parts, going to see friends and family in distant lands. I miss the staying behind on the island and going to the beach every day with friends and their children. I miss the closeness that came from that. I miss the fact that all activities ceased: from school activities to club meetings to bridge playing. The whole place went into suspended animation.

I remember the Summer parties, more like get togethers. I remember the simple pleasures of finding fresh fruits and veggies not found during the rest of the year, the fact that it stayed bright and sunny well into the night, just like back home, but better! It was indeed a magical time. I don't think everyone saw it that way...but I did and I miss it.

Summer is here in Miami. The days are so bright your eyes hurt and so humid you can hardly go out without looking for an air conditioned place to duck into. Even my usually straight hair get frizzy...yuck! I go out into my balcony and see the swimming pools around our building: full of people enjoying the warm weather, splashing around until it gets dark in the evening. Looks like fun...or not! They must be tourists.....people from Miami cannot live without their the term airco better though!

Having no children in school, planning a vacation this time of the year lost its charm a long time ago. I do not enjoy going anymore to places full of screaming children and the beaches in the area have not really made me want to sit by the water and enjoy the sun with a Tropical drink in my hand.....the swimming pool in our building is enough, but I do miss those days!!! So what to do? Plan a trip!!!

This weekend, that is exactly what I'll do. Plan a trip, not back to Panama. It's been too many times in the last few years and for the wrong reason. No, this time I want to see Camille in London, to visit Thelma in see Europe in the Summer after years of traveling only during the cooler months. It's going to be an adventure, one I am looking forward too!

Monday, May 23, 2011

Move On....Dare!

Once you have decided that reinventing is the way to go....move on with the idea. There is no point on coming to a conclusion and then...just letting the ball drop. Absolutely not the thing to do. You need to step up and make your plan come to fruition. To do that, you need to dare, not easy I do know. Most of us were not brought up by parents that actually preached this. Think back....were you ever told that you needed to take risks? needed to just go ahead and act upon your ideas? I, for one, do not remember hearing this.

Yes, my mother was very positive and always said that we could do anything, we should dream and make those dreams come true, but there was not real encouragement on acting on them! A contradiction, indeed. My maternal grandmother used to say that if one doesn't jump in the river, how does one know one can't swim!!!! A statement way ahead of her times, but was not a daring soul herself. So much for reinventing; not quite sure my mother listened to these wise words either, even though she was forced into decisions that changed her life.

Now, here is another crossroad and most of us are really trying to do what we feel is right for ourselves....well, some of us at least are trying to. Hand twisting, coming up with excuses, going back and forth over how we should do this. Nothing coming out of this heart wrenching frustrating! Dare, that is the only way. It is not a matter of trust vs control, it's not a matter of trusting others: it is daring to trust yourself. You know yourself, you know what you want and you should trust yourself to achieve it. Julia Cameron, teacher, filmmaker, poet, artist, journalist, playwright and composer has said: "Leap and the net will appear". Can't think of a more appropriate quote.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Reinventing....not Changing!

Technically it is still least somewhere it is! Time for renewal and rebirth. In Miami, Summer has hit with a vengeance: hot and humid already...but never mind that. Back to the real purpose of Spring: reinventing. This seems to be a theme for a lot of people these days. Everyone has a different reason, but the result is the same: when in doubt: reinvent!

Research conducted in the USA has discovered that we are limited by our imagination. We have the idea of what happened at anytime in our lives and we rarely look to see if it really happened that way. What to do? It's human nature, it seems. We are set in our ways and hate taking risks. Our decisions were taken because they were safe, whatever that means. We craved acceptance, so being different and taking risks, were not really the thing to do. Did you really chose your career or your lifestyle based on your passion? Did you really saw the purpose of your life when you started? Some of us did, of course, but they were the minority, trust me. Most of us just chose what was acceptable and practical because we didn't know ourselves well when we decided.

Then we hit 50, the big 5-0, and suddenly we realized we are going to live another 25-30 years, maybe more! We have another life ahead of us, we think of our choices and pause. Maybe they were not exactly what we should have done, maybe we played it safe, maybe there is a new opportunity to do it right: reinvent. Perfect, go for it, we say......not so fast, we suddenly realize. What do I really want at this time and is this reinventing worth it?

Doubts creep into our minds: I can't do that, I'm too old to try this, what would people think, how will my family react, it's too risky...have I covered every excuse? maybe you have some others just as important sounding or as logical, you think. Well, we are all wrong! To reinvent ourselves, all we need is the desire to do so. We know each other well now, we have confidence and passion, we know our purpose, we can do this. We are not going to change ourselves, reinventing is not changing, we are going to live as we truly are. Not as the world sees us, as our friends and family see us, but as we really are inside. Go for it: reinvent yourself!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Reflexions on Mother's Day......

Yesterday was Mother's day. Celebrated in most countries in the world, this is a day to spend with mothers making sure they feel appreciated and we are grateful for all they have done and do for us. Stores and business go out of their way to promote this day, adverts everywhere point out to the best presents we should buy and the best places we can take Mom for brunch or dinner or something. It sounds beautiful and make a lot of us feel guilty and we go out of our ways to get presents, eat too much and spend time around our mothers fuzzing...really. It becomes overwhelming....I have a bit of a problem with all this celebration.

I subscribe to the premise that every day is Mother's Day. It is everyday that we should show our love and appreciation, it is everyday that we should be there when they need us and it is everyday we should behave in the matter they have taught us. That is the way to honor them properly....but what do I know. After all, am I not a mother? In the opinion of many children these days, we do not know much. Period.

Anyway, I did go out for a lovely brunch with my husband and son. Nothing too much and very appropriate. There was an older lady in the company of her daughter and granddaughter, now that is a thing I would have loved! My mother and I and my daughter. I missed them, especially Camille so far away in London. She did call, but that hardly takes the place of a hug, a touch, her presence. Everyday is Mother's Day, so everyday, I wish she was nearer.......

We got back home and I had a lazy Sunday which suited me just fine. On Mother's Day, the last thing I want is work on anything! I did check my Facebook messages and sent some to friends. Went for a long walk in the late afternoon, time to reflect and to enjoy what is out there. Would have loved some company, but as soon as I left our building realized this walk was my present to myself......loved it!